29 September 2011

I was born at 12:49 am on a Thursday 23 years ago. In less than one hour, it'll be the exact moment, on a Thursday once again, 23 years later. 

I want to title this post, "On Failure," because I set a few goals to reach by my birthday and I'm not in shape enough to run three miles today and I did not blog everyday until my 23rd birthday. I did not accomplish either goal. Epic failure. But how depressing would it be to have a blog post, on my birthday, that was forevermore titled-- "On Failure"? And so I've left this post untitled, which is how I like my posts lately.

I feel like this birthday of mine plus my inability to accomplish goals calls for some sort of philosophical rambling about learning to be okay with ourselves as we are and practicing that very okay-with-ourselves thing as we grow older. Or maybe I should ramble about how these looming goals have been quite the heavy backpack-- a burden that I am, oh, so glad to be rid of. What a birthday present! I could advise that it's better not to set goals because then we wouldn't ever have to write a post on our birthdays about being out-of-shape and inconsistent.

But you know what, I'm not going to ramble about any of that. I'm just going to wish myself happy birthday and be proud that since I made those embarrassingly-lofty-for-me goals I have written more posts on this space than the rest of the year combined, times four. And I have run at least once (or twice) a week, which is huge for me.

I'm just going to write, on my birthday, how lucky I am. What a beautiful life I get to live. I'm grateful today. Grateful for a sleeping husband, a midnight telephone call from a happy-birthday-crooning sister, fresh sunflowers on the table, a box of sunburnt peaches, and few regrets. Grateful for my mom who 23 years ago today was in the final stages of labor getting ready for my debut.

And as the cherry on top of all this gratitude, I'm going to write that a bit of failure never hurt anyone, especially when life, lived simply, packs so many beautiful successes. Call it rationalization or call it truth.

Here's to birthdays and all those goals I never plan to reach.

5 comments:

Carolina said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LAURA!! I'm glad you didn't title your post with "failure". Because really I think you're a pretty accomplished and impressive girl. Hope you have a lovely day!

Brittany said...

Happy birthday Laura. Though it hasn't been everyday like you promised, I have enjoyed reading more of you. I still think you are so neat.

Hope your day is wonderful!

Unknown said...

How about calling it, "On Progress."

I hope you do accomplish MANY of your life goals. I think you will.

Carolina said...

Hope you had a happy day and more to come. I think you're doing great things.

Caitlin said...

Wah! Love you, Laura. Your post made my eyes water a little.